The plan is still in its infancy, but we’re hoping to curb lodging costs by tent camping, using coupons for better rates at mid-priced motels, and essentially wearing out our welcome at any relatives’ and friends’ homes along the way.
We’ve also talked about possibly driving through the night to some destinations while the little ones watch movies on a portable DVD player, complain every five minutes that their siblings are bugging them, and possibly even sleep. I’m not sure the last part of the idea is going to stick, though, knowing how much a road trip to Portland completely exhausts our family – and that’s with a potty break in Centralia and ice cream cones near Longview.
We recently took a trip to Seattle and felt lucky that there were only two stops along the way. First, our daughter got car sick; that led to a huge “But I wanted to go to McDonald’s!” tantrum by the 5-year-old, a you’d-better-eat-that-or-we’ll-sit-in-the-car-while-everyone-else-has-fun lunch and a round of potty breaks. Thirty minutes later, we were back on the road, only to realize that my husband and I were in desperate need of coffee, and the 2-year-old needed to use the bathroom again.
By the time we reached our destination, which was the Pacific Science Center, the kids were excited and ready to run around and explore. My husband and I, on the other hand, were ready to go home and take a nap.
One of the reasons why I never believe those epic Hollywood end-of-the-world movies is because the families that are in long lines fleeing the big cities are far too calm and organized.
If a giant meteor was crashing into our community, I’m positive that my 2-year-old would still insist on lollygagging by carefully stepping on every single landscaping brick on the way to the car, and buckling the seatbelt by himself (which usually takes longer than the drive to our destination), and then cry inconsolably because he didn’t “win” the ongoing self-imposed race against his big brother and sister to be the first at everything.
Meanwhile, the other two kids would probably bicker over whose turn it was to sit in the middle seat, which CD we’d listen to first, and which store we’d stop at for some fleeing-to-safety snacks and beverages. Knowing that our home was on the cusp of being destroyed by a giant fiery meteor, an alien spaceship or some type of earth-shattering natural disaster would only add to the don’t-make-me-pull-this-car-over drama that we experience on a regular basis.
Which is why building a vacation around a road trip both excites and terrifies me. Minnesota is 30 times the number of miles as Seattle. With our family, that will probably equal scores of pit stops, tantrums and consoling “What were we thinking?” cups of coffee.
But if everything goes as planned, the kids will get to meet some of our long-distance relatives, and see places that are important to our family and heritage. I’m expecting plenty of drama, with a side of wonderful memories.
Former Olympian reporter Lisa Pemberton is busier than ever with her three children. She can be reached at lisapemberton@rocketmail.com.
