I’d like to offer a toast to the GOP offering with my new Trump Chump Cocktail Recipe. Like the bully he is, this drink will not go down easily. It is designed to reflect his repulsive nature.
Chumps for Trump should pour the three ingredients (1 oz. Campari, 1 oz. Calvados, 1 oz. absinthe) over your shoes, then splash bitters all over yourselves. End by doing what you’re good at: lap it up.
Go ahead vote for him and have Trump Towers build the great wall. What could go wrong? Trump chumps and the Donald will make America ridiculous.
End with a toast to the end of our winning streak under natural selection. The rise of the Chump Trump sub-species proves Darwin was wrong about the survival of the fittest.