The fireworks were in the freezer and other secrets that keep the peace

The fireworks were in the freezer. They had been there for quite some time. Everyone seems agreed on that.

I imagined that the late head of our house, Sir, had stored the explosives in the extra freezer in the garage with an eye toward having them ready when they might be legal. That’s reasonable. Everyone knows there’s nothing an engineer loves like a good explosion, and when the time came, he would certainly have been ready.

With six growing children, we’d always had that extra freezer in the garage. (After the kids grew older and left home, we kept the freezer. One of them might come back to visit and we’d need a place to store the fatted calf.)

Then came a terrible summer of shattering grief as I learned to be a single parent and I lost track of a lot of things. Fireworks in the freezer were just one more thing I couldn’t possibly account for.

One day I went to put some laundry in the freezer, as one will do. The Roman candles and accessories weren’t there, and the freezer had gone back to being a storage place for old hamburger, laundry waiting to be ironed, and batteries, of course.

Getting ready for this Fourth of July, I asked for family memories of how Dad had planned to dispose of the frozen fireworks. I was unprepared for the firestorm that followed.

Younger Daughter responded cautiously, “What’s the statute of limitations on this? I may remember something about this very vaguely, but I ain’t no snitch.” (My children were all university educated).

“I don’t know if these were fireworks left by Dad, but I definitely remember SOME nameless sibling shooting off a Roman candle like thing, which hit the telephone line outside, though it did have the decency to just bounce off harmlessly.”

“Also,” she reflected. “People are telling me off the record that it wasn’t a Roman candle so much as a mortar and shell type set up. Sure was excitin’, though.” ‘

Anonymous Son, who is an attorney, hastens to add, “My client has no comment at this time, My sources are telling me that episode with the telephone wire happened about five years later with fireworks that were, presumably, legally purchased from a roadside stand off Steilacoom Boulevard. But I have it on good authority from a source, a person with knowledge of the situation, that it was no trouble at all to get rid of those fireworks. Light fuse, stand back, with hose, watch explode, wash rinse repeat. Pretty simple really.

“Seems like there are a couple fireworks stories there,” he continues. “We’ll save the freezerworks (see what I did there?) for another time. I just wanted to make clear that I have it on good authority that Dad didn’t have anything to do with those.”

Oldest Brother points out that it’s pretty obvious who the culprit was. “Must I draw you a picture?” he asks. He’s an engineer.

Number One Kid says, “I’d say this is a good old timey story about family solidarity, even though some of the family are now deep into their Medicare years.”

Still, a lot of questions are left unanswered, but that’s the way it is with families. We’ve always loved fireworks.

Legend has it that Captain John Smith set off the first fireworks display in the American colonies in Jamestown, Virginia in 1608, according to the History of Fireworks. Fireworks were used in the very first Fourth of July celebration in 1776 and John Adams set the stage for us by insisting that illuminations (fireworks) be part of each Fourth of July Celebration.

But most generally they haven’t been in my garage.

Tradition is so important on this holiday. In Stephen Vincent Benet’s play, “The Devil and Daniel Webster,” Benet writes of how the patriot remained obsessed with the Union even after his death and imagined Webster would still demand, “Neighbor, how stands the Union?”

“Then you’d better answer, ‘the Union stands as she stood, rock-bottomed and copper-sheathed, one and indivisible.’”

It’s the Fourth of July again. And there’s never been a time when we needed each other more. Here in my condo community, there’s been an ongoing discussion about stripes to be put on stairs and uneven places in the sidewalk so people won’t trip and fall. The discussion had gone on without progress, and then Saturday morning we woke up and the steps and sidewalk are all painted with bright stripes. Easy to step safely.

Yes, I know who did it, but I’m no snitch. We support each other.

Neighbor, how stands the Condo? We stand foursquare on our paint stripes. There will be fireworks!

Where to find Dorothy in July

Catch Dorothy’s podcast, Swimming Upstream Radio Show, at https://swimmingupstreamradiohow.com.

Contact Dorothy at 800-548-9264 or Dorothy@itsnevertoolate.com

Here are the programs:

• July 4: Days to Celebrate with Dr. Patt Schwab.
• July 11: Generation Gap, Faith vs. Religion, Part 1, with Ray Miller Still.
• July 18: Finding your Super Power Part 1 with Regina Carey.
• July 25: Finding your Super Power Part 2 with Regina Carey.