If Valentine’s Day has lost its oomph for you, there’s plenty of other celebrating to do in February
“I asked Gary what we’ll do on Valentines Day,” writes my friend, Sandra.
Gary’s response was not completely satisfactory. “He looked like a deer in the headlights,” she reported.
News coverage suggests that Gary isn’t alone. More than half of Americans report that they’d enjoy an ordinary day — any ordinary day — more than a Valentine’s Day.
Some folks just aren’t the Valentine type, but I’ve got to admit I miss that sentimental occasion, as we celebrated it in Miss Nelson’s 5th grade class when there was a huge Valentine box on the teacher’s desk. You must put in a card for each student if you participated so we learned to share.
Sometimes there were even gifts. Dickie Stacy gave me a toothbrush holder shaped like a penguin. My father broke it right away, but still I kept the fragments for a long time.
When TV came along, everyone laughed at moms like June Cleaver who went around in high heels at home, but the fact is, we stay-at-home mothers were expected to be dressed up, freshly made up, and the dear little children with clean faces when the breadwinner came home. Usually we should have a freshly prepared drink in hand for him. To his last days, I met Sir at the door with a glass of iced tea. That was just what we did.
Valentine’s Day was especially ours. If we couldn’t afford a sitter, and we usually couldn’t, we’d dress up for a romantic dinner at home, after the children were asleep. He’d bring flowers. We’d have a drink or two. And the next year there were liable to be more children. We never quite picked up on that.
As the children grew, they added their own sentiments, making Valentine’s Day even more special.
“Where would I be without my mother?“ one homemade card asked plaintively. “Out in the cold with no hot soup, that’s where,” declared the message that I still cherish. My First Kid created that card for me when she was 9. She prefers not to be described as the oldest. Said kid turned 70 as I write this and to tell you the truth, this is all getting a little difficult.
“My little girl is 70” I sometimes confide to young mothers in the park. There’s no owner’s manual for this time of life, and romance is a little on the scarce side. Medical authorities tell us that keeping a sense of purpose is one of the indicators of a long successful life. For instance, my bank account was compromised last week. That’s not exactly material for celebration, but it did give me purpose.
Many sources say that Valentine’s date goes back to the Middle Ages, when people throughout Europe believed that birds mated on Feb. 14. This belief that birds chose their mates on St. Valentine’s Day led to the idea that boys and girls should do the same. So you are left with the vision of young men and women wandering around among amorous animals and saying, “Yep, that looks like a good idea.”
I will just observe that by the time a person is past 90, romantic valentines are not plentiful. In fact, I had a friend who would write the recipient’s name lightly in pencil on the more expensive cards before handing it to the intended lady. “That way I can use it again if necessary,” he said practically.
There’s plenty to celebrate and that’s a good thing. Other days to celebrate in February include: Groundhog Day (Feb. 2), Black History Month (entire month), Presidents’ Day (mid-February), National Pizza Day (Feb. 9), World Wetlands Day (Feb. 2), World Cancer Day (Feb. 4), International Day of Women and Girls in Science (Feb. 11), and World Radio Day (Feb. 13). I think I’d pick World Radio Day to start with. But you could do a lot with those celebrations.
“It does seem people don’t care about Valentine’s Day as much as they used to,” my Number Three son observes. “I’m not entirely sure it’s even a bad thing, although I don’t say so around my wife, who would be sure it’s a bad thing.”
And Sandra adds, “We do nice things for each other all the time, so Valentines is just another day,”
They don’t call her The Crafty Canadian for nothing. She always has good ideas. Let’s take the hint and do nice things for each other every day. Let me be the first to wish you a happy International Day of Women and Girls in Science. And many more.
Where to find Dorothy in January
Catch Dorothy’s virtual TV show “Coffee, Chat and Change the World” at 9 a.m. Monday, Feb. 3. To register, go to Dorothy@itsnevertoolate.com
Catch her podcast, “Swimming Upstream Radio Show,” or see her holiday TV special
Registration details: Dorothy@keepyourenginerunning.org
Contact Dorothy by phone at 800-548-9264 or via email at Dorothy@swimmingupstreamradioshow.com