Fugitive needles Texas constable on Facebook: ‘I’m on an island sippin’ mojitos’

A Texas constable known for his amusing Facebook posts may have met his match in a local fugitive.

When Bell County, Texas, constable Tom Prado posts photos of the area’s most wanted offenders to Facebook, he often adds a little color to his captions.

“Mr. Green, just call my office. We will be glad to give you a free Uber ride to your local Bell County bed and breakfast....” he wrote on Monday.

This time, the offender responded.

D’Andre Green, 30, is wanted on an assault charge, the Temple Daily Telegram reported.

He commented on Prado’s post and promised to turn himself in, but only after a little vacation.

“I’m on an island sippin’ mojitos... I’ll call when I make it back to town... Enjoy y’all’s summer,” he wrote, punctuating the comment with three kissing emojis.

Prado responded with a simple “lol.”

Green responded again, writing that he just passed Prado on the street, to which Prado replied that he wondered where, exactly, Green was.

“Man u wouldn’t believe... I’m in Miami...” Green wrote. “Caught a sale on [cruise] tickets.... Ima turn myself in when I get back... And I want my damn phone call.”

Facebook users seemed to enjoy the exchange, which amassed more than 1,500 comments. Some, however, questioned the constable’s use of his time, writing that he should “do his job.”

“I can’t understand why people can’t laugh,” Prado said, according to KWTX.

Prado said Green sent him a direct message and while he wouldn’t divulge what the two of them discussed, he did call Green an “okay guy,” KWTX reported.

Prado hopes Green will turn himself in but said Green’s arrest is inevitable.

“I don’t know if he is where he says he is, but we’ll find out,” he said, according to the TV station. “It’s going to happen, no matter what. [He’s] going to go to jail.”

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Dawson covers goings-on across the central region, from breaking to bizarre. She is an MSt candidate at the University of Cambridge and lives in Kansas City.